Undulent Poseur – some reflections on my blog

MirrorMe by MoonVooDoo

Ah, here’s another nice mess I’ve gotten me into! I didn’t think my suggestion for a Daily Prompt would be used, I’m used to do things and being ignored or overlooked, so much so that I rely on it and use it to my advantage. The amount of times I say – do it, no one will notice anyway – egging my often shy, rather indecisive self on can’t be counted, but it is probably about the same number as the times I affectionately call myself an idiot for doing the thing I encouraged myself to do.

Not that it applies to this scenario… not really.

However I think one of the rules of submitting a prompt is that I have to write a post about it. Which in theory should be easy as I must have had something in mind when I came up with the idea. I did. But now I’m lying sprawled on a sofa being kicked in the ribs by a vividly dreaming cat, my laptop is at an odd angle making typing a letter roulette game, and my mind is set to snooze.

Excuses excuses… just get on with it.Daily Prompt: Mirror, Mirror, On the Wall

Think of your blog as a mirror: what does it reveal? Consider your blog name, theme choice, design, bio, posts… what does every element tell you about yourself?

The idea came to me when I was idly staring at my WordPress blog considering changing its look. However I couldn’t think of how exactly to do it as I like it as it is, but I also like changing things.

As I scanned the page I realised that my blog reflected me perfectly. I looked a little closer, my analytical mind switched on and began to dissect each element. It found many flaws, but each one was an expression of me, of how I do things, and the consequences which result from that. Such as my categories are rather sloppy and could use some fine-tuning, but it’s never going to happen. I’ve found that when I get too detail oriented I suck the fun out of things for myself, so unless absolutely necessary I tend leave things a bit messy thus keeping the fun factor.

The name of my blog – An Upturned Soul – is an anagram. It’s a nod to my dyslexia and the fact that it makes my mind a natural anagram generator. Anagrams amuse me, they can reveal hidden aspects of meaning in words. A variation of my blog name is – A Purulent Sound – I often rant and release pent up emotions and thoughts in my posts. The title of this post is also another anagram of my blog name, and it goes well with the photograph I’ve used as a header. I often feel awkward, restless, boxed in, trapped, off kilter, a bit back to front and possibly upside down… I’m not sure if I’m upside down simply because I don’t always know which way is up. Thus An Upturned Soul… and no, I’m not telling you of what it is an anagram. It’s not a secret, it’s just some things are more interesting as a bit of a mystery, and very dull when the mystery is revealed.

The theme – Triton Lite –  is a visual representation of the inside of my mind. I file my thoughts in grid form, I find them easier to access that way, it’s quicker to make connections between them, and I prefer to see all the smaller pictures in one big picture, it helps to keep track of what is there and what is not there, what needs removing and what needs adding. As a child I used to play a game with cards, the cards were cars and I drove them around, then parked them in the grid created by the tile flooring in the house. This later became how I organised my thoughts. I do drive them around before I find their parking spot.

My bio… could probably use a bit of tweaking, but then again that’s the sort of thing I would say when first meeting someone. A while later I would probably think of something better to say, perhaps wish I could have a do over, then decide that whatever came out spontaneously the first time was the best thing to say in the moment and it’s better not to mess with the past, or spontaneous greetings.

The widgets, links and other accessories are the bare minimum. I like to keep things simple, to balance out how complicated I can be, my posts can be very verbose… in fact the other day I wondered if all the dross writers were removing from their pieces when they edited them was somehow being attracted to me and ending up in my posts. Dross is energy and doesn’t vanish when you hit delete, it goes somewhere. If anyone wants their dross back, let me know… although I have become quite attached to it, it’s very cute and fluffy. No, that’s the cat who is now awake and attacking whatever monster is hiding under my laptop.

I grew up surrounded by artwork, and a painting changes based on the frame which surrounds it. Sometimes a simple frame enhances the artwork it encapsulates whereas an ornate frame would overpower it and draw the viewer’s eye away from the piece itself. So, for me, the posts are the main reason for the blog, they are the painting and the design is the frame.

My posts… they reflect what I’m thinking, contemplating, what puzzle I am trying to solve, what subject has caught my attention, what mood I’m in, whether my mind is dominating my moving fingers or if my emotions are bleeding through them in cyber ink. I do not consider myself a writer, I don’t write when I write, I speak… and mainly I’m speaking to myself, hoping I’ll listen to what I have to say and perhaps spot something which is relevant to my life and could resolve an issue or help shift something which may be stuck. I expose my wounds, flaws, and whatever else is up for exposure, it is very liberating and insightful… there have been quite a few Aha moments, self-deceptions revealed Agatha Christie style, slight cringing while hiding behind an imaginary sofa, and cartoon double-takes with sound effects.

As a child I used to talk to myself in the mirror. I still do sometimes, though not that often. I don’t need it like I used to as the conversations I have with myself do not need the eye contact anymore. The relationship I had with my reflection was life-saving, I found a friend, eyes I could trust, and I learned how to relate to myself with love. It has helped me a lot on my journey through life. In many ways, how I write in my posts is how I talk to my reflection… and some of my posts are my reflection talking back to me.

Thank you, Michelle W. at The Daily Post for using my idea… that in and of itself was a reflection for me.