When you meet someone new, you talk with them, ask them questions, spend time with them to get to know who they are, what and how they think, feel and experience life, the world, and others. Shouldn’t you do that with yourself as well?
Some of the best conversations I have had have been with myself, because I know I’m listening, I’m interested in what I have to say, and I really do want to understand myself. This is not something I am ever sure is there when I am talking with someone else.
In fact, more often than not, I know that the other person is only half-listening, waiting to hear for a break in my words so they can jump into the conversation with the thing they have been thinking about, the thing they want to tell me about themselves, and they have been waiting patiently for me to finish my blah blah so they can say something which is far more interesting than anything I have to say.
Isn’t it crazier to talk to someone who isn’t listening, than to talk to someone who is, even if the someone who is listening is yourself?
(bet you understood the above quote even with the typos… the same process applies to understanding others even when they may not use the same words as you or speak the same language)
I often lose my train of thought around other people. The moment I sense that my words are just bouncing off the other person, falling to the ground and lying their like little bits of wastepaper, my mind goes blank.
This isn’t always a bad thing. Sometimes it is a very good thing. It depends on the situation, and each occasion is different.
Not listening is a form of silence, understanding what that silence means is also an important aspect of communication.
If someone is not listening because they have something weighing on their mind, then it is important to hear their inability to listen to you as a need for you to listen to them.
Sometimes listening is the best part of a conversation.
And sometimes by listening to their silence you understand far more than their words could ever tell you, because there is so much more to conversation than words.
Perhaps their inattention, their auditory silence, is simply saying that their ears are closed for business at this time please try later. They are communing and in communication with themselves, and this is what they need at this time.
I love having conversations with people. The interaction is a blending of two energies, and the chemical reaction can produce some very illuminating insights. I have learned a lot from other people, and I am very grateful to them for their role as teacher.
I hope very much that I have returned the favour.
A relationship, ideally, should be give and take, flowing both ways rhythmically, but that is often very difficult to achieve.
When people hold back and don’t say things for fear that they will be misunderstood, or that you will think badly of them, or, worse still, that they will not be able to handle the reaction you have to their words, then conversations become very complicated and confusing. When the things which are not said prevail over and censor the things which are said, then the interaction becomes static. Heavy silence oppresses all who find themselves in its presence.
I love talking to myself, and if that makes me crazy, well so be it, I would rather be considered crazy and live my life as I please and enjoy it, then suppress myself so that others will think I am sane. I’ve done that and I almost bored myself to death.
The blurbs which I post are usually the results of conversations I have been having with myself, often inspired by conversations I have had with others which have continued long afterwards within me, and sometimes they are inspired by things which I have read on someone else’s blog which have started a flow of thoughts and words that need a place to go, to express themselves.
There are many sources of inspiration for conversation… especially those I have with myself
I often catch myself smiling when I write.
Thank you for listening.
Do you talk to yourself? And if you do, do you think that you are crazy for doing it, or do you think it makes you sane?