I may have overrated this personality test by saying it was ultimate (creative license… stretched?)… which isn’t really an official personality type test, online or otherwise.
I definitely did.
I can explain (or excuse) what I did using one of many tools which offer us a glimpse into our possible personality from an external angle.
However you don’t really want to hear about me, do you?
Did I ask that hoping you would say “Yes, please tell me more about you…” or was I being something akin to sarcastic, perhaps cynical or what not?
Tick all of the above and none of the above.
I simply… was it really simply?… read an interesting post – what do search terms tell about you? – which sparked a conversation (amongst other conversations – look at the comments on this post for the other conversations it sparked, such as a ‘Goose’ is female – analyse that.) that I’ve already had with myself because I have a blog… which has stats, and amongst those stats are the search terms which led people to your blog. Those particular stats are a potent mix of all sorts.
The fact that blogs can record your search terms has made me a bit more paranoid than usual about the search terms which I use – OMG what will this person think of me…screw it, they probably won’t notice and if they do… whatever!
I often give (or think that I give) the impression of being bolshie – that impression is partly bluff and partly me. Like with most of us, we are and we are not what we appear to be – so much of how we appear to be depends on who is the audience for our appearance, us or others, both… and who their audience is for their perception of our appearance and their appearance based on our appearance to them. Something like that.
It is intriguing because we all do it – search for stuff online – and it is saying something about us. But what? We need new underwear, maybe?
Should we pay attention to what it is saying about us or just keep going, learning about what we’re searching for and what that which we are searching for can teach us about us rather than what that which we are searching for can teach us once we find it, or should we not look back at our history of searches. Delete history. Move on.
My most recent searches… would tell me what I already know and would tell you that – I play video games, online and otherwise, and need help playing them. I watch a lot of TV and film, and like to know more about them and those within them (I saw that actor in something else playing a similar role… which probably means they did it… if I’m watching a who-done-it series). I take long Wiki walks which sometimes require a search outside of the Wiki compound. I can’t remember stuff and hope the internet can recall it for me – one search was ‘What song starts with ohhhh, ahhh, ohhh…’ which did not find the song for me and I’m not using the ‘hum the bit of the song you know to find the song’ app or I’ll end up with… still not the song I’m looking for.
One recent search which led someone (or several someones – hard to tell if it is a multiple search of one person or multiple people using the exact same search term) to my blog is:
How to meet a man who is not a sociopath or a bum or other parasitic human being?
My first thought when I saw this – if that’s you’re attitude towards the men whom you meet, perhaps you need to switch sides. This gender is not working for you, your personality.
That’s similar to how I feel about those who end up on my blog after searching for ‘evil Capricorns’. Perhaps you need to switch signs, as this one is obviously not working out for you. Rather than trying to make a sign you obviously do not get along with fit yours and your needs of that sign, perhaps you need to look for a sign which suits yours better and meets your needs naturally.
Which is similar to what I think when I see searches related to NPD, narcissism and narcissists – one of the search criteria which causes the most flow of traffic to my blog, so much so that ‘upturned soul narcissist’ is a Google search option – which always makes me chuckle when I search for my own blog – yes, I do that too. I guess I am that!
Admit stuff about yourself, which may be considered something which you should not admit to, which you should keep secret, hidden, censored, requiring a fake and filtered self, with self-control set to maximum, and it frees you up to be yourself as is. Like it, dislike it… it is what it is, which is sometimes far less fickle than liking it and disliking it and catering to such fickle things.
Out of the recent searches which have led people to my blog, this one is the only one which disturbed me – how to bring down a narciccustic child – typos aside which usually can be explained by where letters are on a keyboard, and if the search is being done in a hurry, perhaps on a phone with adult fingers, is this a parent wondering how to ‘bring down’ their child? I wonder if that’s my mother…? Nothing is ever her fault, everyone else is always the problem that needs ‘fixing’ or ‘bringing down’, as in breaking what is not broken so that she can see herself as perfect compared to you – you’re broken, ergo imperfect.
Perhaps we need to talk about Kevin…’s parent.
Sometimes when we are experiencing pain… we think that others are the cause of it. They could be but… where does the solution for such a problem lie?
An excellent post I recently read which addresses this question and quandary, the kind which might inspire one of our searches – Not Magnifying a Hurt
And another post touching upon a similar theme – In Haunting Memory
And another – Sun conjunct Saturn – It’s an Old Story
Another – If Only…
Another – What is Apology?
So many inspiring posts, inspiring people, echoing a themein their own individual way to which we all can relate in our own individual way.
What we search for… is often what we find, but are we just finding what we want to find rather than… putting it all together?
We’re human, so the answer to that will be complicated… time to cut ourselves and others, including those ‘evil’ others, some slack which gives us time to put things together and figure things out in a… nah… just keep going!