Through the Eye-shaped Window

The eyes are the windows of the soul.

What does that mean?

I used to think it meant that if you wanted to know about who someone really was, you had to look into their eyes.

If you plucked someone’s eyes out and look at them under a microscope, would they really tell you anything about who the person is who once wore those eyes… other than that perhaps they are now missing their eyes, and may be in pain because of it.

Those eyes will however tell you about yourself, about your soul (in the case above it might show you as being the sort of person who takes concepts a bit too literally).

And perhaps that is what that saying means.

The eyes are the windows of soul and we can see that soul not by looking into the eyes but by looking out of them. If we want to know about someone’s soul, then we just need to figure out what they see when they look through those eye-shaped windows at the world around them.

How do we figure that out… without making what they’re seeing about what we’re seeing through our eye-shaped windows?


psych-what-people-think-i-doFor similar images you can go to – Perception vs Fact – or you could just do an image search for ‘What people think I do’.


Some might answer that question by evoking that now holy quality known as empathy. Which is quite a good answer… except each pair of eyes which looks at the concept of empathy sees something different, coloured by their view of themselves, which colours their view of others, and colours their view of concepts.

8 out of 10 people think Narcissists lack empathy. Which is fairly accurate…

… however…

8 out of 10 Narcissists think other people are the Narcissists, and that those people lack empathy. They would know things like this because because they are the greatest empaths in the world and therefore an expert on other people.

8 out of 10 Narcissists when taking personality tests would probably find that they’re an HSP – Highly Sensitive Person.

Because those kind of tests rely on our answers to their questions to generate our results.

They rely on how we see ourselves, on how we want to see ourselves, on who we want to be, on who we think we are.

Which influences how we answers things like personality tests.

But do others see us as we see ourselves (and do they want to do that or would they rather see us as they see us, perhaps because how they see us is an intrinsic part of how they see themselves?).

If someone else took a personality test for us, what would the results be? Give it a go and see what happens… if you really want to know how others see you.


what-people-think-i-do- blogger


When I was younger, a regular wish I had was to be a mind reader, for the noble cause of knowing what people were thinking… about me.

Then I became I mind reader, simply by realising that other people were not thinking about me, not in the way I thought they were, but in the way that I was thinking about them.

For the most part, other people aren’t thinking about you when you think they are, they are thinking exactly what you’re thinking, which is… they’re wondering what you’re thinking about them and wishing that they could read your mind.

If they could read your mind, what would they read?

If you could read my mind, encrypted stuff excluded, you’d probably find something like this:


Β anne emondby Anne Emond


Β The most common things I have been told about myself by others, strangers on the street included, are:

I have kind eyes.

I look like I know where I’m going… and therefore also look like I can tell them where they are and how to get to where they’re going.

I’m thoughtful, sensitive, compassionate, caring, and other synonyms like that.

I’m a good listener.

I’m an enigma (said most recently, today and yesterday, by a friend). Example: You like peanut butter. Yes. Do you eat peanut butter. No. But you like it. Yes. But you don’t eat it. No. For dietary reasons. No. For political reasons. No. For religious reasons. No. Then why. I’ve already eaten it. So. So. I don’t get it. You don’t need to. But. But what.


INTP by Sandy McMullenvia Sandy McMullen


I’d be a good influence on their child.

I should be introduced to their son…

That last one, reminds me of an irate truck driving delivery man. He was so impressed with my ability to calm a raging storm (something else people often point out about me) that once he was done being a raging storm he wanted me to meet his son as he saw me as a pontential daughter-in-law.

Yay, me!

I should perhaps include the fact that the reason he was a raging storm is that he’d been in contact with my mother about the delivery and she had managed to press all his buttons until she found the one which made him explode.

My mother is one of those Narcissists who think they’re the greatest empath in the world and that everyone else is a Narcissist.

He made his son call me. I calmed that storm too…

… because…


I will zap the bad thingsnot exactly sure who drew this but you can find some info via Poppytalk


Not really, but it’s a nice thought.

Maybe… maybe not…

Looking at you, thinking of me. Looking at me, thinking of you.

End of.


INTP perceptions


ps.Β  Dear Robyn, maybe your ‘surly’ bus driver isn’t surly at all, that’s just how you see him because of how you see yourself at that time of day, and how you see yourself influences how you see others. Maybe he’s just not a morning person. You should see him at night if you want to really know who he is. Do you really want to know (about his nightly cabaret act)?


    • Ah, the life of an INTP… those MBTI comics scare me, they know me too well. How is such a thing possible, when I’m still figuring this thing known as me out!?! πŸ˜‰

      That delivery man experience is branded into my memory, particularly because after his tantrum (caused in part by my mother having one of her own) wore off… he was all hugs and kisses (not really but almost) and marrying me off to his son. WTF!?!

      It’s not the weirdest experience I’ve had, but it’s in the top ten… where dating stuff is concerned.

      His poor son. When he called, I just said – Dude… you’ve made the obligatory (parent-induced) phone call, now eff off and live your own life! He said – Phew! So did I.

      Eharmony and those sort of sites… I knew someone who created one of them. ‘nough said. I don’t think that one still exists.


  1. there have been many times when I have been sitting or standing alone in a bar, not talking to anyone. Someone will walk up to me and say you should smile or they will ask, are you okay? And sometimes I felt I should answer them that yes I am as far as I know, I am just standing here and bar dreaming about the next big thing that I would like to accomplish…. I must be awfully scary looking.


    • If you were genuinely ‘awfully scary looking’ then I doubt anyone would walk up to you and say anything, they definitely would not dare to suggest what you should do with your facial expression… unless they were hoping to be on the receiving end of a scary person’s displeasure at being interfered with. πŸ˜‰

      Do you know these people (and do they know you) or are they just random strangers? That does make a difference.

      It’s an interesting social dynamic, that whole ‘you should be smiling’ thing.

      It’s a common problem experienced by most humans.

      Although it is more socially acceptable for men to not smile than it is for women. Male models or actors in magazines are often not smiling. Or at least not showing their teeth when they do.

      Women often get approached by strangers (often men) who tell them to smile. It’s a weird scenario, and creates the kind of uncomfortable awkwardness which none of us like whatever our gender – having our personal space invaded.

      It’s kind of funny that humans place so much value on the smile (and will go to great lengths and expense to have the perfect smile), considering that in nature a smile is a warning sign, especially when the teeth are showing.

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