The Laws, Rules, and Usual Mistakes of Attraction

on the verge


I find myself incredibly attracted to an idea, which has the potential to be both a wonderful opportunity and a (or an) usual mistake… which is it? Could it be both?

Whenever I am in the grip of an attraction, either to a person or an idea, or even better – a person who has given me an idea – I tend to get overexcited, and in that condition my logic (if I had any to begin with) gets buried under a pile of enthusiasm.

I over…. do everything!

Or I under do it (which is another way to overdo it) because I over did it… and I’m either too exhausted to get psyched because I’ve used up all my energy or trying to be cautious because of what came before…


INTP-ismsActually there is an in between… as INTP’s don’t like absolutes.


One of the beautiful souls, olivebranch, who has been brave enough to comment on my blog…

[I do appreciate it, your bravery… as I realise I’m a fruit loop, one of those fruit loops who can be quite intense and therefore perhaps scary at times. Maybe that’s what attracts you to me, but may also make me unattractive at times.

What attracts can also put us off… the taboo says BOO!

I’m also one of those who often doesn’t comment on blogs because… it’s quite a daunting thing to do, especially if you think you’re a fruit loop…]

… asked a question:

What type of people are you most attracted to now?

I’ve taken the question out of context for the moment.

It inspired all sorts of ideas, and answers as well as questions, in me.


purpose of the bruises of life


And being a blogger, as well as the sort of person who loves to dig and delve ’til after twelve, midnight, and further into the darkest of dark, into the shadows, the uncomfortable silence, the dark night of the soul, my own mess… searching for something, perhaps a light… this is the kind of question I find very attractive.

I find those who ask this kind of question attractive…

But what is attraction? What does it mean? What does it do? What purpose does it serve?

That’s what the series I’m creating – The Mistakes of Attraction – is based upon and attempting to explore, or … something like that.


how many roads do you see?


Why do you read my posts, follow my blog?

Do you find me attractive?

If yes, why?

If no, then why are you here?

Perhaps one post drew you to this place… what was it about that post which attracted you?

What does your attraction to others, in whatever form, tell you about yourself?

And while you’re considering that, what about the things which you find unattractive… what do they reveal about you?


busy not doing that


I’m inviting you to participate in this series and exploration of attraction in all of its forms…

Question is, are you attracted to the idea of openly participating or are you attracted to the idea of observing from a safe distance what will unfold?

What attracts you? Why? And so on…

Someone whose blog I follow recently asked how they could make themselves more attractive to someone whom they found attractive…

There are a lot of people who give advice about this kind of thing, which we all would like to master even when we’re afraid of mastering it because once we have such mastery… then what?

Some of the advice given… encourages us to be narcissists – see yourself as special, makes others work to win your shine, your attention, your love, pretend to be who you are not to get what you want, fake it to make it and get it!


obsessionIsn’t that the premise of a stalker and other unpleasant relationship experiences?


Some of the advice given… prompts us to be the supply of a narcissist – feed the ego of others to gain acceptance, as the well-fed ego will find you attractive and indispensable. Supply the demand of others, and they will get addicted to you!


see the lightI see problems ahead with this tactic… but I’m not supposed to see the problems with it, which is a problem.


All of that sounds like hard work… is it worth it?

Some of the advice offers an ‘easy’ option… just be yourself, and everything else will sort itself out in a perfectly ideal manner!

Excuse me while I remember all the times I was myself and… wished I had been someone else instead.


Be yourself - no - society


Today The Daily Post asked – Name five things in your house that make it a home.

Are these five things which you list… what is attractive about your home? Are they things which attract you to a place? Are they connected to things which you find attractive in a person – person who is a ‘home’ to you? Are they things which attract you to an idea – an idea which is home to you?

I’m in limbo right now between homes… I’ve pretty much always been in limbo between homes. Nowhere every felt like home… and last night I had a dream which cut to the chase of what home is for me – that place where I feel happy about being myself as I am.

Why is that so hard to find… and why is it so attractive, is it because it is a rare experience?



Over to you…