Second Chances – One Lovely Blog Award Nominations

Have you ever done something and…

perhaps thought it was what you should be doing at the time, but…

awhile later you second guess yourself and wish you had a second chance,

but it’s too late,

the moving finger wrote and you can’t travel back in time to do things differently.

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the moving finger - omar khayyam

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So what do you do when you think you’ve made a mistake? Do you:

a) Try to turn your wrong into a right, justifying what you did, making excuses for yourself until you become entrenched in your position of being right… which will mean that if you get a second chance you may have to repeat your mistake because now you’ve made your mistake the thing that you must do as the wrong is now a right and anything else would be a wrong.

b) Move on and pretend it didn’t happen, use that skill known as selective amnesia and hope it’s a virus that others catch too, and that they will forget what you did as you have forgotten it (but you haven’t really forgotten it, have you… it’s a spikey regret stuck in your gut).

c) Promise yourself that if you can you’ll make amends somehow, by learning from the experience and bringing what you’ve learned to bear upon what you do next, and if you ever find yourself in a similar position, gifted with a rare second chance, you’ll remember this mistake and the lesson it taught, then let it inspire you to not make that mistake again, make another one instead…

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“Make your mistakes, take your chances, look silly, but keep on going. Don’t freeze up.”
― Thomas Wolfe

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In January, SunDragonLady, very kindly nominated me for a One Lovely Blog Award.

I did thank her, I was grateful, and I also passed it on…

the way I passed it on was not the way you’re supposed to do it, I said as much in that post, I said a lot of things in that post, it was a very rambling piece and… I regretted it later, but I’d done it and couldn’t undo it (sure you can delete posts, but I tend to leave my mistakes where they are so I can’t and won’t forget them, and they’ll prod and poke me until I learn something).

The part which I regretted the most about not doing things properly was that I robbed my nominees of the fun of receiving a blog award, or even knowing that they’d received one.

I always used to think that those who were ungracious about being given awards were spoilsport grinches… and yet here I was being a spoilsport grinch. There’s a curse which haunts me – whenever I get all judgmental about others, I tend to end up experiencing the others’ side of that judgement. It’s a rather useful curse as it promotes understanding through personal embarrassment.

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“It is better to know how to learn than to know.”
― Dr. Seuss

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Shortly after I published that post I read someone else’s beautifully gracious and enthusiastic post about receiving a blog award nomination. They did things properly and it was wonderfully inspiring.

It reminded me of when I was a new blogger and received my very first blog awards, how I felt, how encouraging it was, how exciting it was to pass it on (as well as terrifying because I’m very shy and informing a blogger that you’ve nominated them is like inviting someone to dance when you’re a wallflower. Dancing is a delight, but those steps before you do it and lose yourself in it are hard to take).

It also made me promise myself that if I ever received another nomination (which I doubted I’d ever get after how I received the last one), I’d do things properly.

That someone else who inspired me to be a better person (at least where receiving blog award nominations are concerned) if I ever got the chance to be one was – SurvivedNarc – who also happens to be the person who has given me the chance to be one, by giving me a One Lovely Blog Award nomination… a second chance.

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“Someone asked me the other day if I had my life to live over would I change anything.

My answer was no, but then I thought about it and changed my mind.”

― Erma Bombeck

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The rules are as follows:

1 – Thank the person that nominated you and provide a link to their blog.

Thank you very much SurvivedNarc!

2 – List the rules.

The rules are as follows:

  1. Thank the person that nominated you and provide a link to their blog.
  2. List the rules.
  3. Display the award on your post of the award.
  4. List seven facts about yourself.
  5. Nominate (up to) 15 bloggers for this award and comment on one of their posts to let them know you have nominated them.

3 – Display the award on your post of the award.

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One Lovely blog award

 

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4 – List seven facts about yourself.

  1. I’m female (but have been mistaken for male sporadically throughout my life which probably has a lot to do with my attitude, behaviour, and having itty bitty titties)
  2. 47 (this will be the second year I’m 47 as sometime last year I forgot I was 46 and added a year. I suck at math but I absolutely ace being in my 40’s, love it!)
  3. I can speak three languages really badly (including English which in theory is my mother tongue, but in practice it’s nonsense)
  4. When you first meet me you will most likely think I’m one of the nicest people you’ve met (in the last hour), but at some point you’ll begin to suspect that I’m not as nice as you thought I was, and eventually you’ll run away screaming (am I joking?)
  5. The reason you’ll run away screaming may have something to do with not knowing if I’m being silly or serious. Even I don’t always know which is which, but I’m used to it and I can’t run away screaming from myself (I’ve tried, several times, all the time)
  6. I’m a natural redhead (yes, the curtains match the carpet, and they’re both shaggy). I happen to be that rare (according to people who study this kind of important to the future of the human race thing) type of redhead with brown eyes, but if I shine a really bright light into them they look (horrified) and green.
  7. I’m covered from head to toe in freckles (it’s a redhead thing but not exclusive to our club) and if you ever suggest that I should use vanishing cream on them you’ll end up like the last person who said that (no, I did not touch a hair on her perfectly freckle-less body, I simply stared at her in silence. I have been informed that my eyes feel like lasers boring through flesh and bone when in stare mode, and that my silence can feel similar to being placed in a vacuum. I use this power for evil sometimes. Some people find my eyes kind and my silences to be a reassuring haven where they can talk and I will listen without judging… unless you say something stupid about my freckles)

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5 – Nominate (up to) 15 bloggers for this award and comment on one of their posts to let them know you have nominated them.

I’m going to nominate the ones I did before, that includes SurvivedNarc, plus an extra one.

I will let everyone know what I’ve done (sometime soon, the pingbacks will do it for me first), what you do with what I’ve done is up to you.

I’m linking to the blogs and to posts of theirs which I’ve enjoyed reading:

  1. Survivednarc –  Passive. Polaroids. Plea to the Universe. (Dating)  (I know you nominated me and now I’ve nominated you, you can break the cycle if you want to… or perhaps keep this nomination on a shelf for later. You don’t have to pass it on immediately)
  2. ApensiveheartLife Pre and Post Narcissist. The questions.
  3. TellingheavysecretsReparenting Myself
  4. JuliedemboskiFocus on Black Moon Lilith and Focus on Pluto Square Black Moon Lilith (I have this aspect in my natal chart and because of where it is (10 & 1st houses) it relates to how I handle things like receiving nominations and whether I do it properly or not)
  5. EmergingfromthedarknightLoneliness
  6. NedhicksonTwenty one years ago today, something went incredibly right
  7. RobertmgoldsteinWTF?
  8. CeenphotographyShare Your World – 2015 Week #52 (I never participate in these because I forget to, but I love what Cee does with her blog, I love reading Cee’s answers to her own questions, and looking at the soul held within her images)
  9. NutsrokBears Just Ain’t That Bad and Mother and the Rapist
  10. NelkumiHoliday and RIP conscience III
  11. SparksfromacombustiblemindStraitjacket
  12. IwontdietFayotte VS Bully Society
  13. LynettedartycrossFor J
  14. AmommasviewYou May Know Me
  15. NarmadhaaWhat is The Chaos Within?

.Thank you very much all of you for sharing!

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birds and the bees by Tom Lindsay

(design by Tom lindsay)

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33 thoughts on “Second Chances – One Lovely Blog Award Nominations

  1. Unfortunately I feel a bit autistic re this connection to a second chance nomination that perhaps occurred in the thick of all my cancer diagnosis appointments which have led to be being a bit dissociated at times anyway. If I was nominated thank you! I cant follow all of those listed procedures at the moment as I just don’t have time. Love to you. x

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  2. Hiiiiii ! Thanks so much ! I am so excited and so helpless at the same time. I am not used to this and totally sucks at handling awards… And this post is so great ! Freckles rock ! ❤ ❤ ❤

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  3. I have received awards in the past and had every intention of following up, then life happens and days turn into weeks then months and then I wonder if it’s too late. Great to get to know you more and if we were to meet, I’d never suggest that you lighten up your freckles! 😉 Have a lovely day. Koko:)

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you 🙂

      It’s never too late to pass on a blog award, time works differently in the blogosphere and it’s nice to get a fun surprise along the way to brighten the day.

      Blogging can sometimes feel as though you’re sending letters into space, it’s nice to know that someone out there caught one of your letters when it flew by their planet 😉

      It’s lovely to meet you too!

      Liked by 1 person

  4. Thanks so much for your generous nomination and for linking to my post. I do appreciate it, but have an award free blog. I am submitting to agents and am over my head. Hope you don’t think I don’t appreciate it. Reblogging.

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    1. Thank you 🙂

      No worries.

      Best wishes on your submissions, that’s a difficult process to go through. I have a couple of friends who have done it, and you have to grow a very thick skin and be a determined optimist, but that was before the internet. You have a great body of work online and an audience looking forward to more.

      Liked by 1 person

  5. Thank you. 😀 I am honoured. 🙂

    In the past I have not accepted awards although I have done a post where I have thanked the nominator and highlighted other blogs that I like – more or less what you did last month. I agree with Ned (also a favourite blogger of mine) that accepting awards has made me feel uncomfortable – like I’m a fraud who’s saying hey, hey, look at me. At the same time, though, I wanted to be able to help spread the word about blogs that I thought were great, and so I took a middle road. As Ned says, your post gave me a different perspective on that. Survivednarc also nominated me – a blogger I found through your post last month – and it’s lovely how we are now interconnected. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you 🙂

      I’m better at accepting awards than I am at receiving gifts. I once avoided a surprise birthday party which some friends had arranged. I felt bad afterwards about doing that because I saw it from their perspective and considered how I’d have felt if someone had done that to me, but while I was doing it I felt relieved because it was too much attention directed onto me and I didn’t feel up to dealing with it.

      We’re a complex bunch of souls aren’t we 😉

      Like

    1. Thank you 🙂

      Blogging is sometimes one of those mirrors which shows you what your personality looks like. It’s a great way to see yourself from a different perspective, and it can inspire shifts. Awards sometimes give more than we realise 😉

      Liked by 1 person

  6. Thank you for nominating me again! I am giggling as a young school girl when writing that ((or perhaps a school boy, let’s not discriminate and let’s not keep boys from giggling; it is a wonderful feeling to giggle!)). I will keep the nomination on the shelf for a little while, until I have had a it of time to read a few new blogs and get some new nominees… 🙂 I love everything about this post, it has such a sincere and humble feeling about it. I also very much enjoyed getting to know a little more personal facts about you! Take care and see you around.
    🙂

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Thank you 🙂

      I tend to giggle when I’m nervous. I wonder who was the first human to giggle and what inspired it.

      Being given blog awards is one of the many intriguing experiences you’ll have while blogging. It’s a great way to find out more about yourself and others. Have fun with it, do it your way, and when it stops being fun, have fun with that too 😉

      Liked by 1 person

      1. I do not giggle that much anymore, but perhaps more as spring comes along.. who knows 😊

        I absolutely love blog awards and think it is so much fun! I can not imagine a day when I wouldn’t think it is fun, but then again, a lot of things have happened that I could never have imagined.. 😉

        Liked by 1 person

  7. Hey Ursula, I just wanted to thank you for the nomination, and also say how much I enjoyed your thought process through this “second chance” post. Like you, I’ve fallen short in passing along the appreciation for nominations in the past. Not out of disregard; more like discomfort from a fear of appearing to toot my own horn. This post gave me a different perspective on that. And I have to agree with SurvivedNarc! that your is a very lovely blog. Cheers! And thank you 😉

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Thank you 🙂

      I can relate to the fear of appearing to toot your own horn, I grew up half-influenced by the British view that drawing attention to yourself in that manner is very unseemly. Reminds me of Nancy Mitford and something she wrote (I think it was in Love in a Cold Climate) about a bride who was told that she should stop fussing about how she would look on her wedding day because no one would be looking at her anyway.

      Blogging awards are rather strange creations, so they may inspire strangeness in how we handle receiving one for our own strange creations. 😉

      Liked by 1 person

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