It’s Just Not Fair! – a short story about Saturn square Sun
Do you have a sense of what is fair and what is unfair?
Do others agree with you about this?
If they agree with you… is that fair?
Let me put it another way,
which may seem unfair as I may appear to be changing the rules or something like that…
How does it feel to those who disagree with you when you gang up on them with those who do agree with you?
Is that fair?
Really depends on the matter being agreed with or disagreed with… context is a big issue in the issues we have with others and which they have with us.
(I love this riddle)
I have to make a confession here before I forget…
I have a soft spot for those who disagree with me
Is that unfair to those who agree with me?
Sometimes it is,
because I have a tendency to question those who agree with me more than those who disagree with me
(more conditions apply).
Why do I do that?
You could label it a paranoid superstition…
if people are agreeing with me,
there must be something wrong with them.
Of course, there isn’t anything wrong with them,
at least not usually… although… come to think about it… stop thinking about it!
but there is something wrong with me…
so, agreeing with me makes you by default… I told you to stop thinking about it!
I’m messing with you,
the easiest way to explain it is using my astrology chart,
for those who don’t like astrology,
I apologise for using something you don’t like,
but I’m still going to use it so…
it’s not totally an empty apology, it’s one of those which says I feel you but I feel myself more than you… and myself takes precedence in this case because I have to live with myself (and you’re lucky that I don’t live with you).
I’m going to do my thing regardless of your thing and not thing because…
that’s also in my natal chart…
(shown by other things and this particular thing)
and you would like me even less if everything I did was catering to you.
That’s frigging annoying when people do it, when they cater to you, okay it feels a little bit good, but the aftertaste is unnerving and can get on your nerves more than when people don’t cater to you.
(everything is a riddle)
The short story is – I have natal Saturn square Sun.
What does that mean?
Well, the long, detailed, and awesomely superb, spot version can be found written by someone else with this aspect – When Life Isn’t Fair – A Saturn Story – whose post I came across the other day which blew me away, and explained an awful (and I do mean awful) lot.
While reading it I felt as though I was reading the story of my own life, except this was my life lived by someone else (which is sometimes the only way to understand your own life).
Just like me they were not welcomed into life the way we think we should be, and the unwelcoming came from those who created them (same with me). OUCH!
So you’ll always feel unwelcome everywhere by everyone… who do you become because of this and what kind of welcome do you give?
(fill this space)
The Sun represents EGO!… which isn’t always the devil which we’ve made it out to be (we hate ego because ego hates the ego of others and likes to make others feel bad about owning one while feeling good about being one who hates ego)
while Saturn represents… an entity who eats its own children. YUM!
When Saturn squares the Sun…
(the Sun also squares Saturn, but this is a small issue compared to the one presented by the other way around)
you basically end up eating your own ego, and it doesn’t taste good! YUCK!
We tend to expect others to like the taste of our ego…. Awesome has Me in it!
even though we don’t like tasting theirs, for the most part…
so when your life expects you to eat your own on a regular basis, it can make you sensitive to how your ego tastes when you try to feed it to others.
And you can become rather averse to doing that.
Which others may find odd about you.
(the last one is an impossible riddle – you can offend by not speaking)
You end up behaving in ways which go against the mainstream,
even if the mainstream claims it likes ways which go against it in that manner
(the mainstream often lies… due to ego being ego and lying about what matters to it and what doesn’t matter to it).
My natal Saturn square Sun is being roundly fucked by transiting Pluto and Uranus, and most recently by the Aries New Moon…
all which in theory should give me a new, transformed, rebellious perspective on an old curmudgeon.
I did have a brief insight into to it all…
a flash of undies which were shockingly pink and rather cute…
but it’s hard to break free from old habits which die hard, and like to prologue their death scene so everyone can see they’re dying… maybe they’ll hang on for a little bit longer because a few viewers missed their performance.
Maybe this performance of dying will be the one which defines a lifetime! Pa-POW!