The Ultimate(ly pointless) Guide To Blog Comments

Something I said in my reply to a comment on a post on my blog:

When I first started blogging on WordPress, I didn’t understand the Comments part of blogging. I’d popped my blogging cherry on tumblr, and tumblr was different from WordPress when it came to interaction/commenting.

Comments are a part of the post they’re on.

When you comment on a post, you’re adding content to the content of the post. When the post writer replies to the comments on their posts, they’re also adding more content to the content of their post.

I learned that from those who commented on my posts and shared with me the fact that they often read my posts for the comments and my replies to those comments rather than the post itself.

There also used to be this person who kept referring to their comments on my posts as “posts” and they saw their commenting as blogging with me on my blog. They viewed themselves as being a co-blogger on my blog. It annoyed me, and because it did it made me hmmm… about it, and I realised that they had a good point.

Many bloggers think that the comment section is separate from their post.

That’s how I used to see it, even though long before I started blogging I used to enjoy reading the comments on blog posts because I saw them as adding content to the post itself, but I didn’t think about it consciously until after I started blogging and it took a while to get there.

Because not all bloggers view comments as part of the continued flow of the post – the conversation started in the post itself by the writer continues in the comments and becomes a dialogue rather than a monologue – it can make commenting on a blog post complex, especially if you’re me and you want to chat about what was in the post but the post writer just wants praise, simple feedback and not a conversation, more in depth feedback.

As I’m writing this reply, I’m thinking – I should turn this into a post

Melanie of Sparks sometimes introduces her posts as a comment she wanted to leave on someone’s blog post but she had so much to say that she decided to turn it into a post on her blog instead.

So, your comments on other bloggers’ posts are part of your blogging, they’re posts in a way, they’re just posts on someone else’s blog which become part of their post.

I learn a lot about bloggers from their commenting style on other bloggers’ posts and on their own posts – bloggers who don’t reply to comments… or who only reply to a select few… always interesting to hmmm… about that.

I said that in reply to Angie of King Ben’s Grandma after she said in her comment on my post that: “It’s funny, I actually do more writing in comments than posts, even did a post about it, but I never really considered that part of my blogging. When I think about MY blogging it’s the King Ben’s Grandma page. So weird…

Angie and I have comment-chatted about her comments before – she has a very unique commenting style.

Her comments stand out from the crowd of comments in a great way… and when I’m reading other blogger’s posts whom I know she also follows, I check to see if she’s left a comment, because I love reading her comments.

Reading her comments is insightful, energising, inspiring, fun.

They can add a spark to a post which is a bit flat – OMG did I say that out loud, that’s so rude. I wonder if all the bloggers whom we both follow will get all offend-y paranoid-y about it… maybe I was talking about her comments on my posts.

Here’s something else I said in reply to an Angie comment:

There’s this thing I do with my blogging – posts, replies and comments – which I also do more now in RL because of doing it in blog, which is to share my thoughts openly. The thoughts behind, what’s going on inside.

Recently I watched the TV series Fleabag.

I keep mentioning it to people. When I first heard about the series – it won some Emmy stuff and was on BBC news because of it. I thought – It’s too popular, I’m not watching it. My partner saw the same news and said – Let’s watch it! He put it on and I thought – I’m going to hate it. Watched a bit – it’s a British Sex and the City, ugh! Watched a bit more – OMG it’s effing brilliant!!!

The genius who created and stars in it has her main character do this to camera reveal of her real thoughts/feelings and then you watch and hear how she acts which is not always true to her thoughts/feelings because – socialising with people, must pretend, be careful, etc!

When I write posts, and sometimes replies and comments, I tend to do the to camera thought/feeling process reveal. Eg. This is what I’m thinking/feeling about this social scenario, it’s me working things out with myself before I say or do something.

Maybe others can relate, maybe they can’t… but most of us think/feel a lot of things before we publicly say and do stuff. We often think we’re alone in those thoughts/feelings, having those kind of thoughts/feelings, but we’re often not – so I share mine in case someone else is having them too and feels alone, confused, afraid, worried, etc, about having them.

I am doing my natal Chiron in the 7th – heal yourself by revealing yourself, and maybe someone else finds healing for themselves in your healing of self by sharing your “wounds” and general messed up self

The faux facade thing hurts all of us.

I’m going to go off on an Astrology tangent now – skip this bit if you’re not interested (how will you know when this bit is over? Hmmm… I’ll put a pic or something after this bit as a sign of its end), but it is about writing.

Writing isn’t just about writing a post, or writing a book if you’re a book-writing blogger, it includes writing comments and replies.

When I blog I’m not only doing my natal Chiron, I’m also doing other placements in my whole chart, which includes my natal Mercury.

Here’s an excerpt from an excellent article – Mercury: The Writer’s Friend by Arlan Wise on Astrodienst – which is both about writing and Mercury – Mercury’s part in writing:

“In this article, we’ll focus on Mercury as the writer’s friend and examine his role in and his effect upon communication.

….

Now let’s mix in the planets. Mercury adapts to the energy of the planet that he is near. He can do this because he is a shape shifter.

In Greek mythology, Mercury, called Hermes, is the little brother of Apollo, the Sun god. Mercury is tethered to the Sun and can only move 28 degrees away. When we find him in the same sign as the Sun he is saying “I think it, therefore it’s true”. One’s thinking is subjective with a strong identification with oneself. Mercury combined with the Sun writes autobiographies and opinion pieces. His work is original. When Mercury is running before the Sun, he gathers information and gives us time to think before acting. When he follows the Sun, action precedes thinking and there is rationalization. When Mercury is in a sign before or after the Sun’s sign he has some objectivity and distance from the ego.

Mercury combined with Moon is reflective, sensitive. The Moon is Mercury’s mother, or father in the Vedic system where Moon is masculine. Both are planets that have to do with memory and influence one to write about home and family and use the emotions of the past.

Mercury combined with Venus gives artistry to one’s words. He puts his thoughts in a pretty package. He writes beautiful descriptions of nature. He writes love stories and romance novels.

Mercury plus Mars gives impulsive, provocative, and persuasive writing. He likes to stir up controversy. He writes books about war and emergencies. He can write on science. He will be a whistle blower. He prefers to be a journalist rather than a novelist. He loves investigative journalism where he can stir up trouble by telling the truth. He is a prolific writer who writes quickly.

Mercury combined with Jupiter writes travel guides and stories about foreign countries. He is adept at writing spiritual literature and philosophical works. He uses many words and can write long books. He may be too verbose tending towards verbal diarrhea. He needs to find a good editor.

Mercury and Saturn is a good combination for a writer. It gives the concentration that is necessary to finish and edit a piece of writing. They are friends and work well together. The writing is precise clear, realistic, and accurate. They love to do research and write about history, finances, and business.

Mercury and Uranus send the mind to the outer edges and come up with some strange ideas. This combination gives originality and ingenuity. They create exciting, upsetting writings. They can indicate a genius, an innovative person who thinks in new ways. People with this combination write science fiction, utopian and dystopian stories. The work is thrilling and always pushes against the outer edge of accepted thinking.

Mercury melded with Neptune writes poetry. They use intuition to produce fables and works of fantasy. They love to write inspiring spiritual words. They write stories about romance and glamour. They think nothing of bending the truth.

Mercury combined with Pluto gives a mind that is penetrating, investigative, often interested in medical subjects. They write detective novels, horror stories, psychological thrillers and murder mysteries. They will write transformative literature.

Mercury with the Nodes. These people are born to write and communicate. Mercury walks with you thorough life. He is the guide to your destiny.

Mercury and Chiron find the words that heal self and others. They write about alternative methods of health and healing, often going back to once used but forgotten methods. The words they use may hurt and process of writing can be uncomfortable as it heals.”

excerpt from Mercury: The Writer’s Friend by Arlan Wise on Astrodienst

For those of you who think my posts are exceedingly long… that’s apparently due to my natal Mercury being aspected by natal Jupiter: “He uses many words and can write long books. He may be too verbose tending towards verbal diarrhea. He needs to find a good editor.

My natal Mercury makes connections with: The Moon, Venus, Mars, Jupiter, Saturn, Uranus, The Nodes, the Ascendant (which is Virgo, whose ruling planet is Mercury) and Midheaven (which is in Gemini, whose ruling planet is Mercury).

Mercury is also the Dominant planet of my natal chart – one of the top posts on my blog is a guide to finding the Dominant planet of your chart: What Planet Dominates You?

I wrote that post after I got frustrated while searching online for a guide to showing how to find my Dominant planet, so I wrote a How-To for anyone else who might be searching for the same thing to make their search easier than mine was…

Later on I came across a bit of advice from a blogging guru who recommended writing How-To’s as a way to make your blog popular.

That particular blogging guru added the proviso to only do that if:

1 – No one else had done it before – in other words you couldn’t find the How-to when you needed it so you created one in case others needed it like you.

I remember that because it made me happy that for once in my life I’d actually followed advice… even if I’d done it before reading the advice (I tend to do things backwards like that).

2 – Others had done a How-To on that before, but you could improve on what they’d done in a helpful manner.

That blogging guru recommended adding links to other How-To’s on the same thing as yours, especially if those How-To’s were helpful to you and you’d used them as inspiration for yours.

Sometime this year I happened upon an astrology blog while looking up something else and found they’d done a post on How-To find your Dominant planet which was almost identical to mine in how they’d worded it and done it… naughty naughty blogger.

Copying other people’s posts and writing style in a way that is basically a copy and paste theft does happen more often than it really should in the blogosphere… if you find yourself tempted to do it, don’t do it, it’ll do your own style of writing more damage than you realise even if it gets your stats to go boom.

It’s similar to a singer trying to sing in a style which isn’t suited to their natural voice – you’ll fuck up your vocal chords.

Bloggers who blatantly copy and paste other blogger’s posts and pretend they wrote them tend to be super paranoid about other bloggers doing that to them and copyright themselves up the wazoo, putting huge WARNING signs about how super duper copryrighted their work is. That paranoia is a short cut to writer’s block.

If you’re a blogger worried about having your writing stolen – don’t blog.

Or don’t post anything which would crush you if it was copied, plagiarised, etc.

This is the internet.

But be aware that worrying about that will curb your creative flare and creativity, and sap the fun out of expressing yourself freely on your blog.

Remember this – if you’re the source, you’ll always be the source, and even when you ask them not to… others can steal, copy, plagiarise, imitate, and try to pretend to be the source but they’re not the source of your stuff and they can’t take that away from you – they’re taking some water from your stream, but you’re the stream and you know where the source of that stream is – within you.

Being inspired by the style of writing and posting of another blogger, and experimenting with your version of it is something else entirely – do give credit where credit is due, it’s inspiring for those who inspire you to know they’ve inspired you.

I went off on a tangent within a tangent, what I was actually going to say and do was – if you would like to explore your natal Mercury and you’ve never had your chart done before:

Go to Astrodienst (Astro.com) and use their Free Horoscopes feature which has a free natal chart generator which you can access as a Guest User so no account necessary and your data gets deleted once you’re done with it. And you can use their free AstroClick Portait to get a free interpretation – so just click on Mercury and it’ll tell you all about it.

Mercury is the stickman with horns on his head – those horns are actually antennae picking up communication waves from the air.

This is sort of what it’ll look like (I’ve added some extras to the basic chart):

my natal chart

Okay Astrology tangent over…

Now what?

Wtf was this post about?

Oh yeah…

The Ultimate(ly pointless) Guide to Blog Comments… I called it that because I was messing around with the sort of titles blogging gurus use and ultimately… the best guide is the one you create by yourself, from personal experience, for yourself.

I’m going to do one of those bullet point type of things which I totally suck at doing so it won’t be that at all:

If you’re a new blogger (or even if you’re not) and haven’t read any blogging guru advice guides at all…

1 – Think about why you haven’t done that yet.

Maybe it’s better not to…

I didn’t read any of those when I was a new blogger either, because I know myself and I wouldn’t have been able to blog at all if I’d read those before I’d just done some blogging first.

I did however follow a lot of blogs before the idea of having a blog of my own entered my head (thanks to my niece – I thought she was crazy when she told me to tumblr myself, but I was having a midlife crisis Uranus transit which made me up for doing and being “crazy”), and so I had absorbed a lot of inspiration, had a vague guideline from looking at blogs and loving them and what they did from the outside.

Looking at a blog from the inside is different from looking at it from the outside.

I made a mess of mistakes… and learned a lot from them.

When I felt ready enough not to freak out and delete my blog due to feeling useless, unworthy, not good enough, etc… I looked at blogging guides.

2 – When you’re ready to read How-To Blog posts… here are some tips for reading blogging advice:

  • most blogging advice which is good is simple and easy to understand… it’s basically common sense, the sort of thing you figure out for yourself by blogging, making mistakes and learning from those.
  • top popular posts giving great blogging advice tend to be copy/pasted like crazy – sometimes ruthless people claim ownership of that advice and don’t link to where they got it from because they want to be the source. If you can – find the original, the source, Google can help with that, so can forums sometimes. The original author probably wrote other informative guides too and usually has a great blog.
  • pay attention to how reading the blogging advice makes you feel. If you feel bad and want to delete your blog, perhaps start from scratch, it’s not a good blogging guru or good blogging advice for you even if everyone else swears by them and it. Get away from it ASAP! (That includes this post and me). If you feel good, encouraged, supported, etc – then it’s good for you.
  • if the blogging advice is on a blog dedicated to giving blogging advice – check to see if your blogging guru doling out blogging advice has a blog other than a blogging advice blog – usually they do, they often have more than one. The best blogging gurus have usually been blogging since blogging began and was far more difficult to do than it is now, and tend to have at least one active blog (and probably have had many other blogs which may no longer be active or exist) separate from their blogging advice blog to which they link because they’re open and frankly it’s a good way to get traffic to their other blog. If all the blogging guru has is a blog about blogging – how can you check if they follow their own advice and if it works, and other questions?

If you’re not sure where to start…

Start here – a very good all round blogging guide (not all the authors of those posts have blogs of their own but they work, still work or did work, for WordPress):

a screenshot of an article – Calling Emily Post – on WordPress’ own blog – The Daily Post – this is no longer being updated but it has tonnes of blogging advice, resources, guides, inspiration, prompts, etc, from WordPress itself.

This particular article – Calling Emily Post: A Blogging Etiquette Roundup by Ben Huberman – has sections with links to relevant posts on:

  • The ethical use of others’ content
  • Reacting to unwanted attention
  • How not to appear spammy
  • Sensitive topics and sensitive readers

In the section – How not to appear spammy – there’s a link to – Say Something: Commenting Etiquette – which gives practical and truly good commenting advice (below are excerpts from that post – some are more excerpted than others, so go visit the post!):

  • Read thoroughly. Before commenting, make sure you’ve read the entire post and the other comments before yours.
  • Contribute something of value. Every post can be the start of a conversation. Try to add something substantial to move that conversation forward.
  • Keep your comment comment-sized. If you have a lot to say on a certain subject, leave two or three representative sentences in the comment section, then link to a post on your own blog where you have expanded on the topic.
  • Don’t leave shameless plugs. One of the top complaints in the comment thread on my last column was commenters who leave nothing but a link and a ‘thanks!’ There’s no shortcut to building a readership – intelligent and thoughtful comments are the way to go.
  • But do link to your correct site. If you leave intriguing comments, other people will want to check out your blog – so make it easy for them to find you!
  • Mind your manners. If you wouldn’t say it to someone’s face, don’t say it in their comment thread. Criticism is fine, but there’s no need to be hateful. And remember, only a blog author can delete a comment, so if you comment in haste you might repent at leisure.
  • Be yourself. I’ve discovered many favorite blogs by becoming a fan of a certain commenter. Rather than any one comment, it’s the style and personality of a commenter that really makes me want to read more of their work. Whether you are smart, witty, or just plain bizarre – be you! No matter your perspective, a unique voice will get attention.

The last point on that bullet point list brings me around in a circle to where I started this post.

I’m a fan of Angie’s comments! I’ve already said this to her in comment-chat – she could copy/paste her own comments and create posts out of them on her blog if she wanted to do that, that’s how awesome they are!!!

If you’re new to commenting…

Introverted or shy (I know it may seem like I’m not, but I’ve been painfully shy all my life)…

Unsure of how to introduce yourself via comment to other bloggers.

Start off easy, easy on yourself and others, like in RL, with some small talk (yes, I’m an Introvert, and I know small talk is ugh, nope, I can’t do this!!!) – eg. “Great post!”, “I enjoyed reading your post, it gave me inspiration”, “I loved what you wrote, I can relate, thank you for sharing”

Yes, I know what I said about that in a previous post, but it is a good method to start off with… small talk should ideally be the warm-up to other kinds of talk… at some point you need to evolve it beyond that, especially with those bloggers whose posts you regularly read and comment upon.

It’s like in RL, once you get to know someone you want to know more about them and hopefully vice versa, once you’re a regular… small talk should shift to a more regular type of talk.

So:

“Great post! I like this bit because it reminded me of [share your story here and maybe even share a link to a post on your blog where you wrote about something similar – but be sure that blogger is okay with shared links, most are, I am totally cool with it… just not if I don’t know you, that’s all you’re sharing and you haven’t explained why you’re sharing the link – if you’re just sharing a link to your blog to promote your blog on mine and you don’t give a shit about my post or blog… grrr!]

If you’re a blogger and you have “Comments” open on your blog:

Reply to all the comments!

Some bloggers view replying to comments as being time-consuming. It can be if you reply like I do (takes me longer to reply to comments than write an exceedingly long post) and write a post-length reply, but I love consuming my time like that! I get a lot out of your comments and my replies to you, our comment-chats.

If it’s a problem for you, if you don’t have enough time to do it, just say “Thank you” that takes about a couple of seconds to do, you’ve at least got that much time to spare, don’t you… if someone took the time to read your post and leave a comment, then you have time to read their comment and reply.

If you’re just not into replying to comments…

But don’t want to remove the “comments” option because you want others to comment but you don’t want to reply…

1 – Warn people you don’t reply to comments in the blurb you can edit which is above the comment box – the default is Leave A Reply – but love and appreciate getting them. Then they know not to expect a reply and it’s up to them whether they comment anyway.

2 – There’s a handy “Like” button to “Like” a comment so the person who commented gets acknowledgment of receipt and reading of their comment, and doesn’t feel like an idiot for commenting – if I comment and I don’t get a reply or a comment-Like, I’m never commenting again. I might never read another one of your posts – if you don’t have time for me and my words… why should I have time for you and your words? Unless I know you and know you don’t reply to comments or do so sporadically… even then you could “Like” the comment to acknowledge that you’ve received it.

No one “Likes” being ignored. Do you?

3 – If when you comment on someone else’s post you like getting an acknowledgment of your comment from that blogger… and you get hurt when they ignore your comment, but it’s okay for you to ignore comments on your posts because that’s different – it’s not different!

BUT we are all different, unique individuals, even when and if we share similarities, we create our own blogging experience by being ourselves even when we’re trying to be someone else because you can be anyone you want to be online…

SO…

Let’s end this pointlessness with a famous quote?

Now you just have to figure out How-To be yourself…

Blogging is quite useful for that, through your posts, replies to comments on your posts, and comments on the posts of others… you discover yourself!

Keep an eye out for when you say you’re “this” in your posts but you’re “that” in your replies or no-replies to comments on your posts and you’re “the other” in your comments on other bloggers’ posts.

That’s it…

Over to you!

ps. If you’re a new blogger, and have never commented before and somehow stumbled into this post and got this far… you can use my post to test out your commenting.

22 comments

  1. Good Day (not sure what time it is on your end) Ursula🤓
    I enjoy commenting because it’s like a conversation between the writer and the reader. There have been times when the commenting turns into somewhat email correspondence amongst colleagues/acquaintances. Sometimes comments like you said are how you become to know a person.

    I’ve come across some people who like to comment and it’s always snarky or know-it-all like, but over time I write it off as their “thing” or part of their personality, similar to a quirkiness, while one person who comments in a troll-ish, combative nature for which I’ve come to realize its who they are period. People’s words playback in my head long after being said, my mind manifesting them into a quest for true nature, which makes for my dream content🙄

    I really didnt have to comment but it’s kinda like my way of saying “hiya”😊

    Like

    • Hiya Scherezade 😀

      When you made your comment it was 4:54pm my time, according to the data on the comment. That’s around the time I tend to log out of the internet. I used to stay online in the evening but when I interact with people I usually give them my full attention and if I’m interacting online it means the people in RL don’t get my full attention. So I’ve balanced things out.

      The UK is 5 hours ahead of the east coast of the US. So right now, as I write this reply, you’re probably still asleep 🙂

      I agree, that’s why I enjoy comments too, because it’s a conversation. I love the exchange of ideas, you never know what you’ll discover, uncover. Not everyone views comments on their posts as a conversation – so I tend not to comment on other blogs that often. I enjoy commenting on yours.

      There are so many different commenting styles. It’s all rather fascinating, like traveling the world of people through comments. I’ve noticed that there are certain quirks of comment style which reflect the culture and country the person commenting comes from. Some may sound a certain way until you realise it’s a cultural style – eg. I may sound argumentative, but that’s my Italian side and I’m not really arguing 😉

      The snarky know-it-all, condescending types who are actually being and doing that and not just sounding that way tend to give off this very insecure vibe in the way they express themselves – it’s as though they’re terrified of not knowing things so they have to wear a facade of knowing it all, and they’re afraid of being found lacking in some way so they pretend they have it all.

      The troll-ish combative types are often indulging online what they can’t do offline in RL.

      Quite a lot of people explore online aspects of psyche which they can’t explore offline in RL… maybe through their experimentation they solve a personal puzzle and it changes their self experience for them.

      I also think about what people have shared with me in a comment long afterwards and the dynamics of the interaction can be very revealing, insightful 🙂

      Like

  2. Though I haven’t ever been able to understand astrology, I did enjoy reading the rest of the post. Angie and Melanie are both fantastic bloggers who give wholehearted support to the bloggers they follow. I enjoy their blogs and comments. One thing I am missing out is that I read comments on my phone and usually don’t see the comments from other bloggers. I will do that ! Good advice on commenting.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Thank you for sharing, Sadje 🙂

      I admire those who can blog via their phone, I’m not sure how you do it, everything is so tiny and fiddly, and from what I’ve understood through listening to what phone-bloggers say – WordPress is very glitchy on the phone, more glitchy than on a computer. You have great skill and patience… I’d have flung my phone against the wall by now and given up blogging 😀

      Phone-bloggers tend to write shorter posts, and it’s easier to read shorter posts on a phone. I think that’s partly why shorter posts became more popular, because more bloggers blog using their phones.

      Liked by 1 person

    • Oh!! That’s a pretty elongated post and perhaps as Sadje said because I read all WP posts in my tiny mobile …But while reading this I just felt that “Yeah!! I That post is for me… For me …” Because I didn’t took comments seriously but it’s you who turned me on and had shown that ‘Comments opens Windows to let fact/knowledge rays come directly to you.’ In fact now I feel really causious before aspiring anything in comments.😂
      BTW truly enjoying ur blog 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

      • Thank you very much 🙂

        That’s a great point – the tool we use affects how we perceive and experience posts.

        On a mobile long posts get stretched into this very long ribbon of words which appear to go on forever and it is too much to read on a small screen. Short posts fit well on the small screen and are perfect for reading on a mobile.

        On a computer, which is what I use, long posts are more compact, they fit on the screen and are easy to read. Short posts look tiny on a computer screen.

        You have a lovely style of self-expression, just be yourself in comments. Say hi to bloggers you like, tell them what you like about their post/blog and others will welcome you, visit your blog, etc. Sadje’s blog is a good one to follow, she’s fairly new too and she’s a good example of using comments to make blogging friends 🙂

        Like

  3. Wow! Such great advice (but I expected nothing less really). I also fully read your post yesterday, but did not have anything to say. Well I DID, but pain etc etc and brain fog crept in and all was silence afterward. Sorry. Anyway. I began my non-blogging journey on Chat room formats of various kinds over a span of twenty years (yeah, I was there at the beginning of this thing called the Internet and I’ve watched it evolve.) In those places “in the day” it wasn’t called blogging and it wasn’t (well not as I understand it anyway). It WAS a running conversation with loads of folks chiming in and tangents and bits and pieces (threads) all over the place. Untidy really and often a really good piece of writing got lost in all the fuss. So that’s possibly why my comments are so long and why I often just write something on my own blog so as not to clutter the blogger’s comments whose post I so admired. I look on these mini-‘blogs’ (comments) as conversations. Bits and pieces and so forth, because that’s how I was ‘raised’ so to speak. I always, ALWAYS (without fail) enjoy your posts. And I try to read every single word, even when I don’t ‘get’ it sometimes (the astrology bits are often above my head, but there I am mining away to grab the golden nuggets embedded in those sections). Don’t worry about defusing people bombs. The person who is a ticking bomb is going to explode (eventually) no matter what or who triggers that explosion. All we can do is make sure our own heads aren’t blown off.

    Like

    • Thank you very much, Melanie 🙂

      You’re one of the most experienced bloggers I know. It shows in your blogging longevity. You’ve ridden out all the blogging storms, trends, what’s hot right now and a must, popularity contests, challenges, changes, updates to platform, etc. You’re humble and quiet about it unless someone decides to take you on because they think they’re better than you and then you give them a bit of a whack back to reality 😉

      So many bloggers come and go, start off strong, confident, do that blogging too much all at once, they’re going to take over the blogosphere and go stratospheric, be a blogging superstar, and then they hit a wall, things aren’t working out the way they wanted, they run out of steam, gradually stop posting, then pop up once in a while with an “I’m still here, haven’t been posting in a while because of life and stuff, I’m going to start posting again…” and then silence or maybe one more post and then silence.

      You’re awesome and you know it, even though I know you prefer that kept hush-hush 🙂

      I love your long comments! I love your short ones too! I get a lot of inspiration from the way you do you online! I’ve learned a lot about blogging from you!

      I prefer long comments because they are conversations, and for me when someone shares a long comment on my posts, it adds to my post, makes it so much better than it is as is – a monologue which is boring, but with the comments it’s a wonderful dialogue, a brainstorming session, a deep and satisfying communication between souls.

      Like

  4. 98% of comments I receive are everything I would hope comments would be.
    Very occasionally I receive a comment that makes me wonder if I have ticked someone off. They are not direct criticism, but they have a kind of acrid tone to them which makes me wonder if I ought to explain my post further, or find out what is agitating the reader who left me the comment.
    But I long ago decided I shall not worry. I shall try to maintain a positive view of all aspects of blogging and hope for the best.
    Don’t really want anyone to spoil the fun!

    Like

    • Thank you for sharing, Mel 🙂

      Online as in RL some people just express themselves with an edge, as though they’re constantly annoyed, grumpy, bitter and finding fault with everyone and everything they look at. My mother was like that, even when giving a compliment it sounded like criticism – her words always had spikes in them.

      Next time you notice an acrid tone in a comment, just view it as part of that person’s personal narrative – it’s what’s going on with them and their life. They may always express themselves like that, and they may not be aware of how it sounds to others, and might not be able to do anything about it even if they are aware of it.

      I always sound a bit aggressive when I express myself, especially when I’m interested and excited.

      Also it’s worth keeping in mind how what you write about in your posts may affect others.

      For instance I write about narcissists, and that can trigger someone who has personal pain connected to that issue. My experience of narcissistic abuse may remind someone of their experience of narcissistic abuse. It may also attract a narcissist every now and then.

      You write about love, falling in love, being in love, the joys of loving and being loved… it’s wonderful, inspiring, exciting! however many people have experienced the suffering which can come from love, a lost love, heartbreak, betrayal, and some may feel the bitter pill of a love once light and heavenly turned dark and hellish. They might envy your innocence, your joys, or they might feel compelled to warn you of the perils of love to save you from the suffering from which they couldn’t save themselves.

      Your stories shared on your blog and read by others are an invitation of sorts for others to remember their own stories and share their stories with you, sometimes directly, sometimes indirectly.

      Comments are personal to the person making the comment, they tell the life and psyche story of the writer of the comment. Don’t take them personally as they’re not personal to you, they’re personal to them. They can be poignant, affecting, inspiring, and a myriad of human deeply felt and thought.

      If they don’t specifically ask for an explanation of something in your post, and even if they do, there’s no need to explain yourself or your post to them unless you need to do that because of your own life and psyche story. 🙂

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  5. Greetings and Salutations Ursula,

    Thank you for all of the kind things you wrote about me and my words. My ego loves it.

    I never read any blogging advice until maybe the last year or so and I didnt go looking for it, I came across it randomly in my reading. Two things I wish I had known when I started was to use pictures, tags and catagories. Other than that, I’m good.😎

    The astrology info is great! I’m still a jumbled mess, trying to go between apps and tabs on my phone, looking at my chart and reading (again…and again) which house is for what and who rules it, or my aspects from my natal and the transits. I dont know if I’ll ever be able to memorize anything beyond the basic sun signs, but I’m learning. I need to get to the library and print some of the stuff out and put it in clear sleeves in a binder with tabs and stickers on the cover… And there goes my mind…Way out in the water see it swimmin

    I did the thing to find my Dominant Planet and Power Sign (why am I thinking S&M, whips and chains?) It was very difficult to read the charts from my damn phone until I turned it sideways. Hmmmm…. Anyway, my Dominant planet is Mars and my power sign is Pisces. I have no idea what that means.
    My natal Mercury is retrograde in Aquarius with Venus, but he’s in 1st house and she’s in 12th. Mars is chillin in Aries in the 2nd. I’m sure that makes perfect sense to you but I’m going to have to do lots of reading to figure it all out.

    Thank you for another fun thought journey! 😍🤔😎

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    • You’re welcome, ego 😀

      The “use pictures” advice reminds me of a comment I got on a post ages ago which told me that – I used too many pictures in my post and it had made the post vapid and meaningless – that annoyed me but they had a point which I didn’t process consciously until recently when I began to notice how many bloggers fill their posts with pics from pixabay and other free pic sites.

      I sometimes find myself distracted by all the pics wondering why they’re there, where is the writing, and what have the pics got to do with the writing.

      I understand why they’re doing it – they’ve read the blogging guru advice to use pictures.

      And it does add to the post – gives a visual for the writing which can be very effective.

      But sometimes it feels disconnected and creates a disconnection while reading.

      It’s more effective when you can feel that the writer took time to choose a picture with which they connected and which spoke to them of the story they’re telling in the post.

      It helps if they use a pic they took themselves – that’s a wonderful addition.

      Sometimes it just feels as though they popped “dancing” into the free pic site’s search bar and just grabbed whatever came up in the results – that’s dancing, I’ll use that! maybe grabbing 3 of those because why not, the more pics the better to decorate and make the post pretty.

      I’ve been thinking about that old comment, the overuse of pics, the sense of disconnection between pic and writing, and… I’m hmmm-ing about my own posts, I’m considering decluttering, including using less words, less excerpts, less quotes, less pics. But I’m not quite there yet, more hmmm… needs to be done.

      That’s a good approach to astrology. Whatever catches your attention and you’d like to know more about it – Hmmm… about it. So Mars Dominant and Pisces as your Power Sign, what does that mean to you when you think/feel about it. What images are stirred within, what stories come up, where does it take you within yourself, what associations do you make naturally when you think about it?

      Liked by 1 person

      • Hey Ursula,
        I usually only use pictures IN my posts if it’s a game thing or they’re relevant, like my Turbulent Teens pics…I was such a DORK, then at 15 BOOM! I should do some more stories… Anyway, I do look on the free sites for a “featured” pic if I dont have something because I think having that “featured” pic does add to the post. Like the cover of a book, maybe? I spend so much more time trying to find a pic than writing the post because I dont want to just grab whatever. It has to match, ya know?

        At first I was like Mars? But Mars is all war and fire and angry. Then I thought about it some more, especially in relation to Pisces… fire & water, water cools the fire, fire heats the water. They dont have to oppose each other. Mars is is power and strength, the alpha dog. Mars gives my dreamy Pisces the ability to survive my journies for knowledge, some backbone, the presence to get my message across and Pisces soothes and softens my Mars.

        My interpretation, after a little thought with no research (yet😉). I dont know if astrologers will agree. I guess I’ll find out when I do the research, huh?

        🌻💌

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        • Hi Angie 🙂

          Sorry, I went off on a personal thought journey with regards to pics. I was talking to myself out loud @ you about my own posts and blog.

          You use pics really well, totally love the young Angie photos – beautiful!!! Perfect for the series they were in ❤

          You're absolutely right about a featured image.

          Picture sites are wonderful places, very easy to end up spending hours on there – I use Wikimedia Commons and their pics have explanations sometimes and links to articles where the pics have been used and so many things to learn!!! Or to a photographer's Flikr or website and then you're in gallery-land off on a journey through their eyes.

          I think your interpretation is awesome – that's the real experience and that's the best way to work with astrology. The interpretations of astrologers are guides to finding your own interpretation! It's good to have an idea of your own before you explore what astrologers say. It helps to find an astrologer who has similar astro, then their interpretation reflects personal experience too.

          Liked by 1 person

  6. Great post. 🙂

    The first time I got a comment I was elated! Someone liked my scribblings enough to make a comment! It was a fantastic moment. Now, if I like a blog that has few (or no) followers, I’ll leave a comment.

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    • Thank you, Lynette 😀

      That’s really sweet and thoughtful. Passing it on in a good way 🙂

      I behaved like a dick when I got my first few comments on WordPress, and I ignored them. I never forgot dick-me doing that. Dick-me is a source of constant inspiration of what not to do 😉

      Liked by 1 person

  7. Hallo Ursula, what an interesting longread that was. I never thought about commenting as being ‘as worthy’ as a post but I must say I do comment quite a bit and I like to share my viewpoint on a post. So that is actually also of value. When I write a post I can re-read, proofread, add a fancy picture and make it polished. But in the comments, people ask questions and it’s time so get even more honest. It is in the interaction with others that I feel I can grow my ideas of the world, me, the subject on hand. So I need to agree on the value of comments. I don’t know anything about Mercury except that it feels ok to me?

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    • Hello Kacha, thank you for visiting 🙂

      Yes, commenting on a post is valuable, it adds your creativity and insight to the post. Many times people, including myself, find wonderful treasures in what those who have commented on a post have shared.

      It can be difficult sometimes when you’re on the other side of the equation, the blogger navigating comments on their post – if you write about in depth things, like you do, you will get questions which can be challenging, but like you pointed out, it makes you get even more real and go deeper. I have found many aha moments through the comments on posts 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

      • I’m glad I am visiting your blog, it is so interesting and I hope I won’t comment too much! I tend to forget some things and make typos but that is something that comes with the package. Thank you for pointing me to your posts.

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        • Thank you very much ❤

          Don't worry about typos I make lots of those and sometimes they're like strange messages – I have dyslexia so I don't really notice typos, my brain adjust them 😉

          You are welcome to make as many comments as you would like to make, my blog is a bit of a free for all… be warned though I do reply and I am rather weird.

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