My Apple is Poisoned

I’m not going to reveal my greatest fear to you Daily Post or to anyone else. Why do you want to know? Why do you keep asking? You’ve done similar prompts recently about fear. In fact many of your prompts recently seem to be aimed at profiling WordPressians. You want us to tell you everything about ourselves and then what? You’re going to sell that information to some nefarious company? Google maybe? Or… you’re going to use it against us?

Shhh, paranoia, shhh.

Joking or not joking aside…

I’m not telling you my greatest fear, nor am I going to show you courage. But I will reveal a vulnerable moment I suffered last night… which is a gift that keeps on giving, and perhaps I should be thankful, but I don’t live in the USA, so Thanksgiving is foreign.

That was quite clever… 3… 2… 1… okay, I haven’t paid for being a smartass yet, but I’m sure I will. Maybe I should throw some salt on my computer or fumigate it with sage.

Speaking of my computer… that’s what made me feel very vulnerable. Not a virus. Not a worm. Not a trojan. Or that kind of terror which induces vulnerability.

Nope.

I upgraded my system a couple of weeks ago. I was tempted by a new and shiny apple.

I told myself not to do it. Wait until the bugs are removed. But you know how that works. You warn yourself not to take the apple or bite into it, even though you sort of trust the one who offered it to you… and then you ignore your wise logic and act on impulse. NOM!

Really the name of the upgrade should have been warning enough. Why would any sane person let Mavericks take over their computer system?

But I’m not a sane person. I play one in that film known as my real life, but I’m just an actor who does method acting and thus believes their own bullshit in the hopes that others will believe it too.

Now my computer runs as fast as someone who doesn’t run fast or barely at all, and one by one my software programs are collapsing in on themselves.

Questions is… do I backtrack by several steps and reinstall the old program or do I wait this glitchfest storm out, and hope that the constant repairs I have to make will keep me going until the Mavericks become a little less maverick?

That problem reflects my life at this time in an uncannily eerie way. Long story, no short version of it exists, so… let’s just move on.

I’m a ditherer when it comes to making decisions, especially when logic is applied and consequences are predicted, so I rely on impulse to make decisions for me. I own my decisions once I’ve made them, and regret doing that often, but hey… owning your decisions means you can make more decisions if the original one has bad consequences. The problem is knowing which more decisions to make. Dither, dither… where does that path lead? To a Gingerbread cottage? How delightful!

In this case backtracking may be a retreat forward which could solve everything… but perhaps only in the short term… or cause more problems. Waiting it out may cause problems now but solve things in the long term. What to do? Wait or don’t wait? Act or act by not acting?

Eating a poisoned apple worked out quite well for Snow White… or so the fairytale goes.

So… what shall I make for dinner?