A Decadent Sound

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Have you ever found yourself outside of a situation, observing it, seeing all the subtleties and nuances which… you’re certain (and perhaps rather cocky about) that no one else has noticed…

Why can’t anyone else around you see the bleeding obvious?

Are they blinkered idiots? Are you a super hot brainy genius with X-ray vision?

That’s a rather decadent inner sound, isn’t it?

It’s one you know may be bad for you, but its vibrations feel of so good. So warm. So… it’s nice to be you rather than someone else. And that’s a blessed relief when so much of the experience of being human seems to tell us that we should aspire to be someone else rather than ourselves.

“The outer conditions of a person’s life will always be found to be harmoniously related to his inner state…Men do not attract that which they want, but that which they are.”
― James Allen

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Everyone else is better than us… but this time we were better than everyone else.

There are times when we can actually spot something which everyone else has missed, we’ve made a connection they haven’t, perhaps because they were distracted by something which we missed and therefore it didn’t distract us the way it did for them.

In those moments we have a tough decision to make – Do we tell everyone what we’ve seen that they’ve missed or do we keep quiet about it because chances are they’ll not like being told that they’ve missed something obvious…

we don’t like it when people do that to us, even if it can be helpful…

and then we have to deal with being made to feel foolish for being smarter than them on this occasion.

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“Through our eyes, the universe is perceiving itself. Through our ears, the universe is listening to its harmonies. We are the witnesses through which the universe becomes conscious of its glory, of its magnificence.”
― Alan W. Watts

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Do we trumpet our smarts or keep them undercover?

Do we share our harmony even though it might sound discordant to others?

If we keep them undercover we may suffer the consequences of knowing ahead of time that a disaster was about to happen and we did nothing to stop it. Maybe we couldn’t stop it anyway, but we’ll never know and that not knowing will poke and prod us painfully.

But if we trumpet them, we may find that what seemed like genius while we kept that music inside, is actually pretty stupid. We run the risk, when sharing our tunes, of ridicule.

And no one likes the sound of being ridiculed… even though we quite like the merry tune of ridiculing someone else (until we feel the harsh note of empathy for someone we could be at any given time with a quick flip of the switch of fate).

One moment you’re on top of the world ma, then you’re tumbling down the hill as a Jack or a Jill, or an egg-splattered mess of a humpty dumpty who had a great fall from a wall of ego.

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“One heart is not connected to another through harmony alone. They are, instead, linked deeply through their wounds. Pain linked to pain, fragility to fragility. There is no silence without a cry of grief, no forgiveness without bloodshed, no acceptance without a passage through acute loss. That is what lies at the root of true harmony.”
― Haruki Murakami

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I often find myself on the outside of situations. Frequently I’m supposed to be inside of them but I have a tendency to detach and float off until those I’m with within the situation aren’t sure if I’m still there or not (if they noticed my everything but the body which doesn’t float all that well unless there’s water absence).

While I’m on the outside I like to assess things from that perspective. It can yield insight but it can also turn you into a bit of an idiot who doesn’t know they’re an idiot. You get so caught up in this magnificent music playing in your head about how smart you are, how much you see, and how everyone else is a dummy who doesn’t see what you see that… its rhythm mesmerises you dumb.

How can we recognise something in others which we don’t also have within us?

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“Karma is the beginning of knowledge.”
― James Clavell

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Can you spot what love looks like in the eyes of another if you don’t know love yourself? If you don’t know love yourself and how it looks on you, in your eyes, then surely you could mistake hate as love because it certainly makes eyes burn and if all you know of love is what you’ve read or been told about it… it makes eyes burn with fire… so anything which makes eyes burn must be love, right?

Smoking is bad for you, if smoking is bad for you does that make all people who smoke bad people, or people who are bad for you? (to be fair most never smoked in my life people don’t draw those sort of conclusions, it’s the quitters who go to those kind of extremes because… quitting is hard and sometimes you need to hate what you once loved to stop yourself from giving in to it… and so you hate those who remind you of that love, of who you once were and no longer want to be except in those weak spots along the road of life where you wonder… all sorts of wonderings).

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“A man who is used to acting in one way never changes; he must come to ruin when the times, in changing, no longer are in harmony with his ways.”
― Niccolò Machiavelli

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